Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Valentine's Day 2015 (late) entry

So, we had spotty Internet for our IT class last week which left us quite a bit of time. I've began tinkering on some of the features around here (which are quite easy to understand) and have started posting! HA! The last time I used this was waaaaay back in 2011 so having that lesson explain it back to me really helped a lot.

This is a little story I began writing down during the long period we had for IT and since it was a few days before Valentine's Day, I decided to make it a bit more love-themed. Let me also add that I didn't expect it to even reach 500, much less a thousand words.

Unedited, unbeta'ed, unfinished...maybe? Anyway, hope you enjoy this little snippet!

Diamond Diary

"With this ring, I seal my commitment for you, forever and always."
                                             
Looking at the diamond, she can't help but marvel at its brilliance. It shone bright under the moonlight coming from her window, glittering her floor with its dazzling gleam. So small it seemed compared to her hand, yet she was sure it was worth a great fortune coming from the man who put it on her just a while ago. He was willing to do anything, anything, for his precious girl. He was too wrapped up in her world, just like the little silver band adorning her ring finger.

Perfect. Flawless. New.

And, most of all, beautiful.

It was all she hoped to but couldn't be. Because to be genuinely called "beautiful" is to be genuinely loved and it was her only hope that love he had for her would be hers and hers alone, through the ring on her finger.

"My heart is with you through this gift"

Those words rung in her head, over and over again. The words he said were not lies, but why couldn't she shake this feeling of doubt? Of confusion? Of worry? Why would she be worrying about a ring symbolizing his love for her? Shouldn’t everything be fine by now?

Or, maybe, she thought as she began to fiddle with the band, I’m just afraid that I can’t give the love he deserves.

It’s true, though, that a common fear people have when facing long-term commitment is their ability to reciprocate their feelings. It’s not as if she hates the guy, but would her current affections for him enough until death takes their worlds apart? She stopped fiddling her ring on her finger and took a deep breath.

“No person is afraid to love,” she whispered, “But everyone is afraid of not being loved back. So what does that make me?”

She rose from her bed, taking slow steps until she reached her mirror and took a long, hard look at herself. It was picture of perfect calm, devoid of the war going on inside of her head. So picture-perfect, so dream-like, it was a beautiful face suited for a beautiful prince… or is it? For a split-second, a mask of fear was shown in her face before settling back to its calm expression. Reverting back her gaze towards her ring, the troubled lady then returned to her bed once more.

“Let my affections for you be like this diamond.”

What did he mean by that? She thought. Could he mean that his love for her had the same worth as the diamond on her finger? She held up her hand and placed it where the moonlight enters her room, looking at the thousands of tiny facets it sparkled. Could love even be measured? As far as she knew, love can never be measured because it is infinite, it is eternal and it is everlasting. Love cannot be measured by feelings alone, just like distance cannot be measured by the gap alone.

But, what if, a tiny part of her mind spoke; he means that his love would be as strong and unwavering as this jewel on your finger?

And with that, a sudden sense of clarity began to dissipate the clouds in her mind. She remembered her mother saying that love is best represented through rings because it is eternal. That even when one person dies, the legacy and memories they leave on their loved one would last even until their last breath.

She smiled. For the first time in a long time, she had began to see what he was trying to say.

“I promise to be honest and faithful. It is my fervent wish that you believe my words and that you do that same.”

She was reminded once more of some of the confusing words she had received last night. What did he mean when he said that it was his wish that she takes his words in? Did he not believe in her?

And, as if the ring were talking to her, it gave out a painful glare that directed her attention towards it. It was a band that cost a lot. It was definitely something a few people can get easily but most would have to grind by on their savings just to get this ring.

Money. Fortune. Riches. Value. Worth.

Worth.

Maybe she had been over thinking things after, all. She was very sure that if one was given an expensive ring after being showered with beautiful words, they’d be more inclined to lie like the devil and comfort themselves in their ignorance? He didn’t want her to do that. He’d rather be hurt with the truth than to be comforted with a lie.
But, after all, this is all speculation in her part. She doesn’t fully understand all of what he said that night. She doesn’t even know if all that happened were just a dream, after all.

“I’ll be waiting for your reply on this day next year. I hope you come to understand what it is I’m trying to tell.”

On the evening of Valentine’s Day last year, she was given this ring from him right before he left to travel the world the next day.

She knew she was no genius. She knew that she found all of this too overwhelming, even if a year had already passed. She felt that trying to even debate upon this further will only hurt her head. She had already decided on what to do.

She quickly grabbed her coat and headed towards the pier where she will await for his arrival. The sun was already about to rise when she got out of her room. She barely had any sleep on her. But she knew, oh she finally knew what she was going to say. After all, the first step to faith was learning to take the first step on the staircase with your eyes closed.

She arrived on the pier, breathless and nervous. She didn’t know what to expect from this situation at all. She hadn’t told anyone about the ring after all. Not even her parents, nor her closest friends from where she lived.
But when she saw the silhouette of a man standing at the deck of the ship, it seemed that all her feelings of doubt and worry and confusion were fading away for good. For the first time since she received it, she held out her hand to the sky and smiled and laughed and cried tears of joy. She was ready to take walk the staircase blindly, as long as she knew that someone would be holding her hand along the way. And she was more than sure that that diamond’s light would be the one to guide her wherever she went.

The diamond sparkled as the sun continued to rise.

“I love you. Will you marry me?”

“… I do.”

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What Really Happens in College

What Really Happens in College
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